


We Shall Bond Over Completely Normal Things

by Sharkseye



Series: Lets Try This Again... [10]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Bluntness, Dean is Lucifer, Explanations and Reasoning, Lack of Social Norms, M/M, Misunderstandings, kinda a vessel!fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-12
Updated: 2013-03-12
Packaged: 2017-12-05 01:38:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,694
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/717382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sharkseye/pseuds/Sharkseye
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel and Paimon bond while waiting for Lucifer and their question time soon dissolves into conversation.  And the mission is marked as a success.</p>
            </blockquote>





	We Shall Bond Over Completely Normal Things

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for the delay people! My memory stick broke so I had to rewrite this all. Don't worry though, I should be back on track now. 
> 
> One last thing. If anyone has ideas they want to see (canon or not), please comment them and I may integrate them in.

Upon landing _,_ Paimon was surprised to see Castiel already in Lucifer’s house, standing in front of the motel window in the bedroom and not acknowledging Paimon’s presence, though he was sure Castiel knew Paimon was there.  The seraph was such a funny little puzzle, Paimon thought, and one he definitely wanted to explore.  Castiel was fascinated by torture, fine with finding out his charge was the devil and commanded demons in hell like he did it every day yet from what Lucifer had said, Castiel was still loyal to Father and loved his brothers.  It was incredibly odd, kicked out of heaven, flying around in hell, getting aroused by torture and he was still completely an angel, albeit an independent one.  His grace was pure as ever, unlike Lucifer’s with its black taint, it was white with the slightest hint of blue, but then again, that might change if the seraph got into torture himself.

Castiel belonged to Lucifer, Paimon knew that, but with certain crucial emotions missing from his range, he had always been terrible at differentiating the ‘too far’ line.  Not that he wanted to steal Castiel from Lucifer, if anything he wanted both of them, though the difference between kinds of relationships meant nothing to Paimon, so he could be wrong.  He knew he would unintentionally be extremely tactile as he always was, and he knew he wanted to be friends with Castiel, maybe as good as he was with Lucifer, though he didn’t think he’d ever be loyal to someone else like he was to the devil.  Other than that, he really had no idea even if he wanted.

First things first, Paimon thought, a conversation might give some answers.  Throwing himself down on the bed, Paimon crossed his legs and leaned back on his hands before finally greeting Castiel with a drawl.  “Mornin’”

“Morning?  How do you tell time down here?”  Castiel asked, turning to face Paimon and sounding absolutely serious “When Lucifer and I arrived it was early afternoon on earth.”

“Mornin’s for greetin’s and nights for byes” Paimon grinned at the slightly confused look on Castiel’s face, but moved on before the useless topic could be discussed more. “Si’down.  Now that neither of us is dying or running around, I think we should actually have a conversation.  Plus I have some questions.”

Castiel looked rightfully wary at that, but moved over to sit stiffly on the bed.  “Questions about what?”

Paimon snorted at the way Castiel was sitting and muttered a warning not to smite him and to make like a ragdoll before attempting to rearrange the seraph.  He grabbed Castiel’s closest leg, pulled it up on the bed, grabbed the other one and pulled that up too as he pushed on Castiel’s left shoulder, turning him around to face Paimon.  When he was satisfied with the way Castiel was sitting and had moved forwards so their knees were touching, Paimon looked up at Castiel’s face and burst into laughter.  The seraph looked a mix between completely bewildered and on guard, not sure what to do.  Evidently he hadn’t been forewarned of Paimons affectionate nature.  Ah well, he’d figure it out soon enough.

“Just relax and see how much better that is.  Honestly, you were making me feel crude with the stuffy way you sit.  I’m really not going to bite unless you ask.”  Unable to resist throwing in one more comment, Paimon put on a cheeky grin and ran his eyes over the seraph, tilting his head in petty mockery “And underdressed.  I definitely feel underdressed.  You could at least change the suit if you still wanted to wear the trench coat, even Lucifer doesn’t wear a suit.  I feel like a deviant criminal”

“I was unaware I needed to dress to your standards” Castiel replied somewhat frostily and Paimon took a mental step back.  Right, don’t annoy people until they know that practically every second statement is just automatic and not always meant to be insulting.

“Sorry, I’m normally like that.  I was just poking fun.”  Paimon clarified and Castiel relaxed somewhat “For compensation you can ask the first question, ‘bout anything really.”

“We’re trading answers then” Castiel asked, though it was probably more of a statement and by the curious smile growing on his face, Paimon probably wouldn’t like the question.  “Why did you follow Lucifer to hell?”

Paimon barely caught himself from gaping.  Okay then, guess they were going straight into the deep questions.  Biting his lip he thought for a moment about how to answer, it was a big question and he wasn’t exactly sure how to answer that would be satisfying.  “Because he’s Lucifer.  I mean, I know that isn’t a real answer, but it’s true.  He’s the Morning Star himself, and the only being I feel complete loyalty to other than the Father.  When the Fall happened there wasn’t even a question of whether or not I would fight with Lucifer, I knew I would from the moment discord first rang through the host.  I knew what he was like and did it anyways.  Before he became human he had no patience for failures and though I was the only one he would actually call a friend, I knew that he would leave me the moment I fucked up.  Fell with him anyways.

“I always knew it was bound to happen but I never considered the idea of fighting against him.”  Paimon shrugged, surprised to find that even with the years of suffering that followed his choice, he didn’t have to fake nonchalance about the subject.  “I’ve never regretted it.”

“You’re still loyal to our Father?”  Paimon jerked his head up at Castiel’s surprised question and this time did gape.  That’s what the seraph got from his answer?  Another question he was absolutely not going to answer, it had far too much baggage that he didn’t want to poke at even with a ten foot pole.

“No way Castiel.  It’s my turn and you are not allowed to ask that” Paimon asserted with a frown

Immediately Castiel’s eyes widened and he backtracked, “Of course, I apologize, it just surprised me.  Go ahead”

Paimon offered only a brief nod in acknowledgement.  He sat up straighter, started to tap his fingers on his knee and then met Castiel’s eyes.  “Why do you find torture fascinating?”

“Because it’s so different and precise” To Paimons surprise the answer was immediate, Castiel had evidently put quite a bit of thought into it.  Made sense, Paimon supposed, an angel finds they like something in hell, they’re bound to question why.  “Before Lucifer rose and when the angels saw I was getting too close to Dean, they dragged me back to heaven and tortured me, calling it reeducation.  They plucked my feathers, fed me demon blood and burnt away at my grace with holy oil, but none of them enjoyed it or got imaginative with it like they do in hell.

“Well, I think Zachariah did, but to all the others it was just duty” Castiel amended and Paimon reached out, gripping Castiel’s shoulder to offer comfort, pleased when Castiel leaned in slightly. 

Though the seraphs poker face was unbelievable, Paimon could hear the distress in Castiel’s song and mentally cursed the angels who had done that to him.  Even during the Fall when interrogating angels in hell the fallen angels had hesitated to use demon’s blood and lit holy oil.  Seemed like heaven had grown worse in Paimon’s absence, though knowing Lucifer, he doubted Zachariah was still alive. 

Castiel nodded in thanks and continued, steering away from the emotional side of his answer.  “Seeing torture in hell is so different.  All the demons enjoy it, researching and experimenting on the best and most artistic ways to cause pain.  It’s so different from my experiences in heaven where they just used brute pain without any precision.  The better someone is at torture, the more alluring their work is, I want to know how and where it works.  I even thought about it some, and I think I would like to watch Lucifer torture someone.  He’s told me a little about it, being both the devil as an archangel and Alastair’s apprentice as a human, and I already know he’s good at it.  Torture’s just such an integral part of all this, and with me being in hell more often I want to learn about that”

Castiel looked guilty suddenly, as if he had said something he wasn’t supposed to, and Paimon rushed to reassure him.  “I get it.  For me it was more fun than intriguing, but I completely get it.  Also, I think you should talk to Lucifer ‘bout that.  I’m positive he wouldn’t be averse to taking you along sometime, throw in some pie and it’d be everything he loves in a great big funfest.  Hey, who knows, maybe you guys’ll finally fuck afterwards, torture always get emotions running high”

“What?”  Castiel had relaxed during his assurance, but at this last statement he stiffened again. 

“Well I know Lucifer’s emotionally constipated, but—oh right.  Angel.”  Paimon grinned.  Lucifer was emotionally stunted because of the human-monsters from when he was a human and the whole mess with falling, and Castiel was an angel so completely sheltered by heaven.  “Lucifer loves pie, torturing souls and you.  And his car, though I haven’t actually met her yet.  And torture’s a _really_ fun activity.”

“But I thought—” Castiel cut himself off to tilt his head at Paimon and narrow his eyes.   “Aren’t you two together?”

“Nope, I’m just very tactile and he’s just learned to deal with me.  I feel love as loyalty, can’t really make an emotional connection past that.  Plus, you two would be so cute together!”  Paimon smirked at the last comment, if Lucifer had been there he would’ve never gotten away with it.  There had been assumptions about him and Lucifer in the past, it was nothing new or offensive.

“Oh” Castiel said softly, and for the first time during their conversation he was the first to look away.  “I see”

“Not even kidding. Castiel, you better go for it, ‘cause if you wait for Lucifer it’ll be years, and if you ever tell him about this conversation he’ll call us hopeless and throw in the towel.”  Paimon advised, pausing before adding an amendment.  “Probably only literally though.  He’d never really give up on us, but he might soak the towel in something sticky first just to be mean”

“Why would Lucifer throw a towel at either one of us?” Castiel asked in confusion, his head tilting even further to the side so that it actually came to rest on Paimon’s hand which was still on the seraphs shoulder.  At this Paimon couldn’t suppress a giggle that would definitely have had Lucifer throwing in the towel if he wouldn’t have already

“One of these days you’re going to get really confused and break your neck” He joked, pushing Castiel’s head back up with his thumb. “It’s a human saying, not really sure what it means, think it’s like giving up.  But hey, between the two of us we should be able to figure it out.”

 

~*~

 

The first thought that ran through Lucifer's head upon entering his room was that someone was possessed.  This thought was quickly discarded, as everyone in the room was indeed possessed, which was not new information.  This was awesome sure, but even so, Lucifer was debating on bringing out the holy water and angel blades just to check. 

Paimon and Cas were sitting face to face on the bed, knees touching.  Paimon was being his usual tactile self by practically breathing the same air as the seraph, his hand on Cas’s shoulder and leaning forwards, so that was nothing new.  The weird part was that Cas just took it, both of them were completely engrossed in their conversation and ignoring their positioning, Cas completely comfortable with an archdemon half-draped over him.  Lucifer suspected that if he didn't already love and know both of them he would be feeling jealous, but as it was he felt nothing of the like.  It would be awesome if they could get along, he knew Gabriel and Paimon would get along, but he hadn't thought Cas would be this okay with the archdemon.  Judging from the scene in front of Lucifer however, he thought that maybe Paimon could weasel his way into all of the different parts of his family just as Cas had.  Sam would be a bigger issue, but he had trusted Ruby, so he might come around.  Lucifer was actually quite pleased about this change in events, but nevertheless, decided to announce his presence by having some fun.

"So should I get the two of you a room?  I'm sure hell can rustle up another motel room if that's your thing, ‘cause I really don’t want you using mine" Lucifer grinned as they both whipped around in shock, having been completely engrossed.  Paimon seemed to realize just how tactile he was being and removed his hand, offering up a slightly guilty smile while Cas's eyes widened and he looked at the floor like a caught out school boy

"Make sure to actually put some thought into it" Paimon suggested, pulling up his serious face that he was actually terrible at. "I don't know how you stand to live in this dump, but I want to choose the rug if I'm getting one."

“Hey now, no need to be mean. You’re lucky I didn’t go with shag carpet here, ‘cause I can tell you many stories of rooms that haven’t changed _or_ been cleaned since the 70’s.”  Lucifer threatened

“More often than not I’ve flown to Lucifer’s motel rooms and felt like levitating or going blind just to save myself from the décor.  It’s truly hideous” Cas added, looking back up at Paimon and giving a serious nod, grinning when his comment broke Paimon’s terrible poker face into laughter

“Alright, alright!” Paimon gasped and Lucifer had the stray thought of wondering whether the archdemon was stoned.  Probably, violence always made Paimon more emotional, wherever on his lacking spectrum.  “I plead mercy!  Do not bestow the horrors of the shag carpet and lava lamps upon me”

“I’ll think about it.  But I’m warning you, ever step out of line and I’m changing every carpet in hell” Lucifer chuckled.  Oh the theatrics of life.  “But anyways.  It’s good to see you guys bonding, cause I’m probably going to have to talk to someone upstairs eventually and you’ll need to spend a lot more time together.  Doubt that with all the noise hell’s been making that Mikey and the other angels will leave us alone.”

Cas nodded slowly, twisting around to fully face Lucifer.  “Yes, and even if he doesn’t, Raphael won’t be so reserved.  He had quite a bit to say about advancing the apocalypse.”

Lucifer froze, his mind moving miles at a time and his previous light mood disappearing.  Archangels never talked to the rank Castiel had been before his upgrade, so he cautiously ventured, “Raphael’s the one who smote you?”

“Yes” Cas nodded, oblivious to the way Paimon also tensed, meeting Lucifer’s eyes and a silent acknowledgment running between them.  “Him and Michael are the ones most working towards it, Zachariah was too, but he’s dead, and I’m not really sure who else.”

“Do you know any other angels who might help us stop it?”  Paimon asked, drawing Cas’s attention away from Lucifer, who he had finally noticed was almost thrumming with restless energy, his protective streak kicking in tenfold at the memory of Cas’s death.  Yes, Raphael would definitely pay for what he had done, but it was best to wait.  Cas would be upset, so he couldn’t know

“I think so, there are a few who might still listen to me.”  Castiel speculated, “I could go and ask, I can talk to most of them without anyone else noticing.” 

“That’d be awesome” Lucifer agreed, forcing himself to relax and push the whole Raphael thing aside.   “You’d better keep yourself alive though”

Cas smiled, his blue gaze meeting Lucifer’s green one.  “I will”


End file.
